Allowing Yourself to Forgive

Hating is like swallowing a spoonful of poison each day and hoping that it will kill your enemy

This quote isn’t mine, and I can’t remember where I read it, but it makes so much sense when you really think about it.

We all carry hurts inside of us. Some are big, some are small. But they all add up over time. They just sit there, in our bodies, festering, waiting a chance to morph into something else.

All they need is more food.

More bitterness, more resentment, more negative thinking.

When you forgive someone, even if you only do it in your own mind, you aren’t doing it for them.

You are doing it for you.

For your own peace of mind.

For your own health.

For your own spiritual growth.

You don’t even have to tell them that you’ve done it.

Especially when you have already extracted yourself from a situation that was soul numbing in the first place.

In our society there are some misconceptions about closure.

Closure is not something that you have to share.

You can have closure for anything in your life, no matter how big, how small.

By gathering all of the bits of yourself together into one cohesive package and talking to them, really talking to them, and then listening to what they need to hear from you to be at peace, you can become peaceful.

You can get quiet in your own mind. You can get off the hamster wheel that keeps you from focusing in the daytime and keeps you up at night and rest.

It may be as simple as starting each day by looking yourself in the eye in the mirror and saying it wasn’t your fault.

Followed up by I love you. I’m proud of you. You survived that. Yes, that happened to you, but it’s not happening now.

And finally, saying to yourself ……..I will live my life for today.

I will live in the now.

I will be the best friend that I can be to myself.

I will love and approve of myself first.

You can get to that peaceful point in an amazingly short time.

The next step is to begin anew building stronger, healthier relationships.

You will be blown away by the kind of people you draw into your life when you love yourself first.

People who add to your life, add to your spirit, add to your enjoyment of everything you do.

People to trust, who don’t drain, who don’t take.

If you are in a situation that drains you, where you are feeling less than you know yourself to be……I urge you to walk away.

If you can’t walk away, I urge you to protect your spirit.

We only get one life.

There is no reason why we can’t be happy and fulfilled while living it.

Sometimes all it takes is the first small step.

That first no.

Or, conversely, that first yes that we give to ourselves.

Yes, I will love me. Yes, I’m worth loving.

Forgive yourself all the small and big hurts. Love yourself. Others will love you for it.

Stop taking the poison.

There are plenty of other folks out there to take it, the manufacturers won’t go out of business, so no worries about wrecking the economy.

Karen Schindler is a full time novelist currently editing and researching publication of her first novel while writing the second novel in the series. She has started a grass roots movement in her area geared toward using positive energy to help heal the mind and body. You can contact her at

Love doesn’t only mean saying “I Love You”, but it is about expressing it in every possible way at every possible time. Someone has quoted that you don’t need to voice out the true love; if it is true, then it speaks out for itself. We often love people from heart but we forget that we let the other person know about our love. It happens that you love someone and the other person also knows that you love him or her but trust me that only jesters are not enough sometimes and you need to do something extra for your beloved one.
Valentine’s Day is the best day for the same and is globally celebrated as the day of love across the nation on this globe. Everybody who is in love celebrates this day by making it special and memorable in some way or the other. By celebration it is not meant that there are some rituals involved in it, but it is only about love that you have to give and to take in any matchless style of yours. You can choose to send flowers for Valentine’s Day or you can send gifts for Valentine’s Day – it depends upon person to person. You should sweeten the day by getting some chocolates for Valentine’s Day or a nicely iced cake for Valentine’s Day to make the day out of the ordinary. There can be many further ways of expressing love, but it will again would depend upon where you are what you like and what your beloved likes and loves.
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